Categories
1 Star Movies

Cinderella (2021)

If your movie is based on the world’s most popular fairy tale, then it can be understandable why you would want to put a twist or two on the story. Whether it was told by Disney (animated or live-action) or the lead was either Hilary Duff or the 90s pop star Brandy, Cinderella was always about a story enchanting girls and  young women with the dream that they would one day  be swept off their feet by that special someone. The newest version of Cinderella likes to add on that Ella can be her own woman and does not need a man to have her dreams come true. This of course is not a problem, but it was never what the source material was about.

They may as well have called this CRINGErella.

Categories
3 1/2 Stars Movies

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021)

As the second film of the MCU’s Phase 4, Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings also holds the distinction of being the first true origin story film of the MCU since 2019’s Captain Marvel.

Of course, one could argue that Black Widow was also an origin story, but we have seen Natasha since 2010’s Iron Man 2. Shang-Chi is a character we had no interaction with until now. Like a good amount of the films in the series, it showcases a character that only true comic book fans know something about (I can still remember when non fanboys like myself needed the movies to introduce the likes of the Guardians of the Galaxy, Thanos, Black Panther, and even Iron Man.)

Categories
5 Stars Movies

CODA (2021)

The story has been told many times, in many movies.

A teenager/young adult is the odd one out of their family as he/she tries to follow their passion that will be in direct conflict with their family, despite the family being a loving one. These are movies such as October Sky (1998), Billy Elliot (2000), Bend it Like Beckham (2002), Sing Street (2016), and Blinded by the Light (2019). Even if the movies were good to some degree (as are the previously named films, in my opinion), we know the formula so well that it is near impossible not to predict what will happen.

Categories
4 Stars Movies

The Suicide Squad (2021)

Even though it is the definite article used in all English language, I admit I did not think just adding “The” in a movie title could be a big improvement to a sequel.

Still, that change will help you remember which of the two Suicide Squad films is the superior one.

Categories
3 Stars Movies

Black Widow (2021)

Even with the COVID pandemic pushing back the release date of Black Widow (and a host of other films), the newest Marvel film indeed seems to be arriving rather late.

Perhaps those who have never seen a film from the MCU won’t feel that way, but for the rest of us, it is inevitable (pardon my Thanos plug there) to feel this film should have come out before the events of Avengers: Endgame (2019), where Natasha Romanoff (Scarlett Johanson) dies. That fact still hovers over the second female lead film of the MCU (after 2019’s Captain Marvel), leading us to feel like those behind the scenes may have screwed up.

Categories
5 Stars Movies

Summer of Soul…(or, when the revolution could not be televised) (2021)

Why?

That is the question that was on my mind not long into the documentary Summer of Soul. It continued to grow more and more until the credits began to role. Most of the time, when this one word question is in our heads during a film, it is the beginning of the question “Why was this movie made? It is so bad!”

Categories
1 1/2 Stars Movies

The Tomorrow War (2021)

Maybe I was just Mr. Grumpy pants when I was watching this film.

Perhaps I just was not giving The Tomorrow War a fair opportunity to try to be a semi fun time travel film. I do confess that I can overthink a lot at movies, but it did not take me a long time to realize this film should have stayed in the future. The very, very distant future.

Categories
4 Stars Movies

The Map of Tiny Perfect Things (2021)

Some movie formulas are so much fun you can’t help but want to put yourselves in the character’s shoes.

If it were a body switch comedy (or any genre), you wonder, “Who would I want to switch bodies with?”. If it were a fish out of water plot, where would you as the (hypothetical) fish wish to be? And, if you were stuck in the same day on a constant loop (most notably done in the classic film Groundhog Day), what would you do?

Categories
4 Stars Movies

Luca (2021)

Dear Link,

From all the stories and photos you mom put on social media, it did not take me long to realize you and your younger brother Lenny had a blast during your first ever trip to Disney World.

This, of course, has been a bit of a family tradition going back long before you were even born. It’s been nearly two decades since I was last there: Pirates of the Caribbean was not even a movie yet. It was also brought to my attention that, before you guys left, you and Lenny watched most of the Disney classics to prepare you. Take it from me, that is a lot of movies for two brothers who are only five and four!

Categories
4 1/2 Stars Movies

In the Heights (2021)

When the credits rolled at the end of In the Heights, I stayed to see if I could find out how many extras were used for dancers. I soon realized that the list would have been at least the size of three screen shots. I returned home, I logged on to HBO Max, and (to the best of my ability) counted how many extra dancers were used.

The final count I arrived at was 274. Honestly, it may as well have been 96,000.